Chilli Pepper is hungry
Shoplifter's downfall !
A man stole chilli-peppers, only to collapse with stomach cramps after eating one.
Marcus Banwell,39, stole Scotch Bonnet chillies in Bristol on Aug 4. They have a heat rating of 100,000-350,000 Scolville units, while a jalapeno is 2,500-8,500.
Banwell admitted possessing two class A drugs,three shop thefts, receiving stolen goods and breaching his licence from a previous prison sentence. Banwell a.k.a.' Lucky' was jailed for 14 weeks at Bristol magistrates' court.
Cricketer attacks 'dive' home town !
A county cricketer has offended his home town, calling it a "dive" and saying it was filled with rude "scum". ( Not the brightest idea to say about Northamptonian's, especially when playing for the county)
The Northamptonshire all-rounder David Willey, the son of the former England player and current umpire Peter Willey, tweeted: "What is it with the majority of Northampton being incredibly rude!#mannerscostnothing#scum".( Get back in your box Willey !)
Niall O'Brien, a team-mate, responded:"Town centre ?" to which 22-year-old Willey, who is from Northampton, tweeted: Yes, terrible isn't it! Absolute dive!". ( What's that other word for 'Willey' ? Begins with 'P' and rhymes with ' dick' )
The player later apologised for his comments.( Horse and barn door spring to mind !)
A man who turned to growing cannabis after his garden-gnome business started to struggle has been jailed for two years.
Jason Lee, 42, aroused suspicion after a £70,000 electricity bill went to his landlords, Flintshire council.
Lee, of Rhyl, Denbigshire, admitted producing cannabis worth nearly £100,000, at Mold Crown court. The judge accepted that Lee regretted his actions, but said his operation was ' sophisticated'. The court heard council officials were suspicious about Lee's garden ornament business due to the locks, security lighting and CCTV installed.
Police had searched the premises and discovered 84 cannabis plants in a growing area with artificial lights, reflective walls, feed and ventilation. ( It' Gnome-joke !)
A Tortoise has been found crossing a main road after travelling more than 70 miles from home.
The male Hermann's tortoise was found in Stirling, central Scotland, last Saturday. A dog identity tag glued to its shell had a phone number suggesting it had travelled from the east coast town of Arbroath.
But, the number was no longer in use and the tortoise was taken to the Edingburgh and Lothians Animal rescue and Re- homing Centre, where staff have since named it 'Noddy'.
( perhaps he could get a slot at the festival , relaying his adventures, though it would probably be a slow set and a little drawn out.......boom, boom !)
ALL THESE STORIES ARE 100% TRUE !
My favourite headline of all time was reported in the Northampton Chronicle&Echo many years ago , it read .......:
Man jailed for selling
Gnome-grown Cannabis !
Jason Lee, 42, aroused suspicion after a £70,000 electricity bill went to his landlords, Flintshire council.
Lee, of Rhyl, Denbigshire, admitted producing cannabis worth nearly £100,000, at Mold Crown court. The judge accepted that Lee regretted his actions, but said his operation was ' sophisticated'. The court heard council officials were suspicious about Lee's garden ornament business due to the locks, security lighting and CCTV installed.
Police had searched the premises and discovered 84 cannabis plants in a growing area with artificial lights, reflective walls, feed and ventilation. ( It' Gnome-joke !)
Women stay best friends longer than
Men !
Women are twice as good as men at making lifelong friends, a survey has indicated.
One in three women said their best friend was someone they had met at school, while the same was true of only one in six men, who were more likely to find friends later in life, at university or work.
Both men and women have, on average, just five friends whom they would describe as 'close'. Although the 'friendship groups' are of similar size, women's tended to be of more long-standing.
Despite only five close friends, both men and women tended to have up to 50 names in their mobile phone contacts, as well as
between 50 to 100 "friends" linked to their Facebook accounts.
The survey of 2,000 British adults by Orangina found that a quarter of men and a third of women have used social network sites to re-establish friendships.
However, the research revealed that friends are not always forever. In a majority of cases, best friends only last half a lifetime and the number of good friends slowly decreases, leaving an average of just three friends by the age of 60.
Thirteen per cent of men and 16 per cent of women admitted there is at least one person in their friendship group who they do not really like.
Thief traced by Footprints !
A Thief who tried to escape by swimming across a canal was caught after police traced wet footprints to the front door of his home.
Benjamin Queen, 22, tried to lose officers who were chasing him over a haul of stolen goods.
But he chose a rare dry spell during July's bad weather and left a watery trail to his flat.
Queen, from Rishton, Lancs, admitted handling stolen goods and was given a 12- month conditional discharge by Blackburn magistrates.
Police went to Leeds and Liverpool Canal in Rishton after a report of suspicious behaviour. Queen saw the police, dropped his bag, and jumped into the canal.
£18,000 for cashier after coins injury!
A bank cashier has been awarded £18,500 in compensation from former employer Natwest after she injured her back lifting bags of coins.
Ms.Deller, 26, from Folkstone , was asked to lift two sacks , each containing 500 £1 coins and weighing about 21lb, on to a trolley.
She heard a pop in her back and felt a shooting pain, which aggravated a previously undiagnosed spinal condition.She was left in constant pain and can no longer enjoy her active lifestyle,leading to depression.
She has secured an £18,500 out-of-court settlement with Natwest to cover loss of earnings.
Carp fishermen come to blows !
Anglers have been involved in scuffles with eastern European fishermen who have ignored British traditions by killing carp.British anglers traditionally return coarse fish such as carp, tench and perch to the water after catching them, but in countries such as Romania it is the custom to kill them for the table. The simmering tension has led to violence, with a scuffle breaking out on a lake in Kent.
Graham East, of Gravesend's Dolphin Angling Centre, said an immigrant was thrown into the water at Gordon lake by a furious local angler after illegally trying to make off with a large carp. "Several anglers tried to explain that what this gentleman was attempting to do, to take one carp home, was illegal.....but to no avail due to the language barrier," he said.
"One of the local fishermen protesting at what was happening then stepped forward and pushed the captor holding the fish into the water."
he immigrant was helped from the lake while the carp swam off. Mr East warned that British waterways could end up empty of fish unless more was done to educate eastern Europeans.
And Finally :
Stray Tortoise found
70 miles from Home !
The male Hermann's tortoise was found in Stirling, central Scotland, last Saturday. A dog identity tag glued to its shell had a phone number suggesting it had travelled from the east coast town of Arbroath.
But, the number was no longer in use and the tortoise was taken to the Edingburgh and Lothians Animal rescue and Re- homing Centre, where staff have since named it 'Noddy'.
( perhaps he could get a slot at the festival , relaying his adventures, though it would probably be a slow set and a little drawn out.......boom, boom !)
ALL THESE STORIES ARE 100% TRUE !
My favourite headline of all time was reported in the Northampton Chronicle&Echo many years ago , it read .......:
