NEWS IN BRIEF'S

                       NEWS IN BRIEF'S

   "Cheeky Monkey"

  A man who had a monkey hidden in his 

    underpants was arrested at India's Indira

  Gandhi International Airport in Delhi yesterday. The smuggler and two accomplices were changing planes on a flight from Bangkok to Dubai when arrested. The rare Lorris monkey-seven inches long and weighing just over five ounces-was recovered unharmed .                

            MEAT PLANT CLEANED WITH

                           UNDERPANTS!

 The owner of an unlicensed meat processing plant could be jailed after inspectors found machinery was being cleaned with underpants.

Kamran Ajaib,27, supplied 20 tons of chicken per week to fast-food outlets from Hamza Poultry Ltd in Bristol.

Officials raided the premises after a piece of metal was found in a takeaway meal.

They found a series of health and safety breaches.

Ajaib, of Bristol, pleaded guilty to failing to comply with food hygiene regulations. He will be sentenced in crown court next month.

                            100% TRUE !!!

He , He, He.....HELIUM:THE PARTY'S OVER !

                    " THE PARTY'S OVER ! "
THEY are feature of many a children's party, but helium balloons are using up valuable reserves of the gas which could be used in life-saving equipment, an academic has claimed.
  The gas which is lighter than air used to fill foil balloons is             "hugely frustrating" and "absolutely the wrong use of helium gas. Tom Welton said when appearing on BBC radio 4's- Today Show, who is a professor of sustainable chemistry at Imperial College.

 Helium gas possesses a unique combination of properties which gives it a range of applications, but it is particularly useful as a coolant.
 MRI scanners, which allow doctors to visualise the inner workings of the body with life saving potential, are reliant upon the element to function.

 Each MRI scanner needs up to 10,000 litres of liquid helium to work.
 However , there is currently a global shortage of helium, which is in finite supply, cannot be synthesised, and must be extracted from the Earth's crust.
 Wholesale prices have soared by 20 per cent in recent months, this is due to extraction levels being at 70 per cent of the volume of helium distributed in 2010.
 Professor Welton said in his interview "On the whole we're using more and more and we're supplying less and less." He added "The major use is for cooling things, particularly large magnets. The impact that this has on us is MRI scans. The reason we can do MRI is we have very large cold magnets and the reason we can have those is there is helium cooling them down."
 He concluded " We're not going to run out of helium tomorrow, but on the 30 to 50-year timescale we will have serious problems of having to shut things down if we don't manage to do something in the meantime."
 Helium is the second most abundant element in the universe but most of the gas in the Earth's atmosphere escapes into space.This is the reason that supplies trapped beneath the Earth's crust have to be extracted.
 It is usually removed as a by-product in natural gas extraction,and as a result the gas fields of Texas and Kansas have become the world's helium capital.

 The US produces 75 per cent of the world's helium and the largest store is held in an underground reservoir called the Bush Dome run by the American government near Amarillo,Texas.
 The gas itself is only refined in a handful of industrial plants throughout the world, several of which are suffering shortages.
 Did you know that NASA uses helium in space shuttles and space stations- usually to pressurise Thrust engines.

                      "What goes up , must come down ! "

MUSHROOMS THRIVING !

           MUSHROOM'S

    " are MAGIC this Season! "

      THE wet summer may have meant a shortfall in many

      crops , but one foodstuff is in abundance.."MUSHROOMS."

      After the poor weather over most of May to August, 

      followed by the recent hot spell, wild fungi are flourishing.

      Foragers spurred on by celebrity chefs are already 

      searching for field mushrooms and other delicacies.

      Pete Brash, of the National Trust,said " This is just the

      start of the traditional mushroom hunting season, I imagine

      if the warm weather continues it could be a bumper year."

      The Health Protection Agency has warned however,that

      some species can make people sick and advised foragers

      to seek expert advice. Some varieties are so toxic that they 

      can prove fatal and toxins are generally NOT destroyed by

      cooking.

      Nicholas Evans, author of ' The Horse Whisperer', had to

      have a kidney transplant after consuming an inedible 

      variety in Scotland.

      Ray Tantram who leads foraging expeditions in Mole Valley,

      Surrey, warned people against picking anything they are

      not completely sure of.

                "STICK TO WHAT YOU KNOW !"

    I personally find this variety, pictured above very tasty.
    " Psilocybe Cyanescens " They make a beautiful pot of tea,
    and afterwards the stresses of the day just flow away.They
    make a stroll in the country very relaxing, you tend to 
    notice things you may not have spotted before. The simple 
    act of listening to music takes on a world of it's own, the 
    permanent grin on your face gives you  a 'magical'
    feeling...................

     But seriously, be careful what you forage and make

     sure you have a good Friend with you ! Be Safe !

    
              

DECISIONS IN LAW AND UNPROFESSIONAL BEHAVIOUR !

             'Paedophiles's Paradise'

A JUDGE has given a paedophile permission to go to Center     Parcs while on bail. ( I kid you not, no pun intended. )

EX-Scoutmaster Stephen Daniell,48, admitted encouraging boys to strip and perform forfeits on camping trips, but a judge at Maidstone Crown Court, Kent, said he could visit Elveden Forest, Suffolk, (pictured above a playroom on site) with his wife as long as he didn't "misbehave".(Unbelievable !) The window cleaner, of Tunbridge Wells, pleaded guilty on Monday to "six" offences of indecency with a child. The Judge adjourned sentencing.

Center Parcs said it had cancelled Daniell's booking, as it was "not appropriate" for him to visit. ( Thank God somebody was on the ball !)

This so-called Judge (Judge Dread), should be severely reprimanded for this decision, and perhaps a visit to Center Parcs to view the family orientated nature of these holidays.

What is his wife is thinking ? It beggars belief ! 

And whoever uncovered this at Center Parcs should receive a promotion. 

Judge Dread is probably so out of touch that he does not know what Center Parcs actually is.

Does this give you faith in the legal system ???  

               Stop your "CROWING"

The owners of a cockerel that starts crowing at 3.43am have been served with a noise abatement notice.

Matt and Kerry Summers who live in a residential area in Weston, Bath, have been warned by Bath and North East Somerset council that they face a fine of up to £5,000 if 'Rodney' breaches the order. On one occasion , the cockerel was recorded as crowing 26 times between 4.35am and 4.51am by environmental health officers. (Surely they have more important issue's to be dealing with ? )
Mr Summers, 39, a self-employed electrician and father of four said: " There is no black and white figure for what is above the acceptable noise level."

                    Broadmoor Worker

               'sent note to patient'

A Broadmoor counsellor wrote a note to one of Britain's most dangerous men telling him he was 'very special', while a colleague she was mentoring had an affair with a patient, a tribunal has heard.

Tracy Morton, a clinical team leader, is alledged to have tolerated inappropriate conduct at the top security Broadmoor psychiatric hospital which culminated in a therapy assistant resigning amid allegations of a sexual relationship with two patients.

Ms Morton was sacked after asking a junior colleague to give a packet of sweets to the unnamed patient in the top security wing,along with a card- which asked him to dispose of it by eating it,the tribunal was told.

She is also said to have entered rooms alone on a ward for the most high-risk and dangerous patients.( Who is supervising these members of staff ? Surely there is a system in place that tracks staff movements, i.e electronically or a paper trail )

Ms Morton is suing the trust for unfair dismissal over the allegations of security breaches.

Michael Humphrey, the director of security at Broadmoor, said the wording of the 'card' was ' akin to terms of endearment' which was ' completely at odds with a professional relationship.'

                                    And Finally :

                      ' BAILING OUT '

Jemima Khan ( pictured left ), once noted that George Galloway  is " one of the finest orators in British politics" and added that, had he chosen to make law his profession, he would have made " a brilliant QC, with his forensic, retentive mind and his ability to win an argument."
One wonders if it was the Respect MP's silver tongue which persuaded the socialite to part with £20,000 in bail money for Julian Assange ( pictured bottom ), Kahn has since tried to distance herself from Assange. She declines to outline her present position on him. She is silent too, on whether she concurs with Galloway's (right) assertion that Assange shouldn't be facing charges of rape in Sweden, but merely the accusation of " bad sexual etiquette."

It appears to me that if your a criminal, terrorist, non-English or American you can rely on Galloway's backing..                             

                         'Assange'